I JUST WANT TO BE ALONE!

In all my experience working in the corporate world I thought I seen every level of lunacy known to man. But I was wrong.

To give you a little history I work with 6 people on a B-shift testing various components of software and hardware. I see 5 of these people every night. Granted we work on different projects but we still see each other passing in the hall or working in the same lab. The last person I work with I have not seen for the better part of 2 weeks since I started B-shift. You’d think I would have run into him once or twice especially since we’re on the same project. But no this man has been a phantom to all of us. Management assumed he was helping out the other projects, since ours was in some down time. And we assumed he was doing some special testing assigned to him by management. Turns out he was doing neither. He had been hiding in one of the test areas for the PAST TWO WEEKS! You heard me! Here was his M.O., he would come in, grab some papers, muster up disgruntled look on his face, and scurry off to one of the testing rooms. No one would see him for the rest of the night and no one volunteered to go looking for him. There had been rumors floating around to what exactly he was doing in those rooms. And known of us wanted to be the one to catch him in the act of …let’s say…conducting self- reliant “HARDWARE” testing (*WINK*).

Now, I told you that story to tell you this one. Yesterday afternoon I went into work at my usual time anxiously counting down the minutes to when I could home. It was a typical day, I got my workload for the night and I set off to perform my assigned test suite. As I began, I noticed the ever-aloof co-worker nervously walking down the hall. I didn’t think anything of it because more than likely that would be the last time I would see him that night. About an hour goes by and in walks my team lead holding a small bundle of papers. She smiles and asks me if when I complete the work I was doing could I finish up the pile in her hand. Sure, no problem. As she turned to walk away I noticed the name of the stack of papers she just handed me. It was the name of my phantom co-worker! I was a bit confused because I had seen this guy slink by no more than an hour ago. So I asked my team leader why I was doing Captain Creepy’s work for him if he’s here. Hang onto to your chairs people, this is a doozy! The reason why I was doing his work was because he didn’t feel like being around people that night and wanted to be off by himself. Honestly, I didn’t know what to be upset at more. The fact that this jittery little FREAK, who has been hiding out for the last 2 weeks doing NOTHING, had the balls to ask that! Or the fact my “Team Leader” actually said it was OK! At that point I realized that we as a society had reached a turning point. We had reached a fork in the road of life and took the path straight to Pussy-ville! Now I had seen this on TV with the 2004 election, school not allowing students to play dodge ball because it’s too demeaning to children’s fragile egos (instead that play a game called “Circle of Friends” were they sit around and share their feelings) but now it was starting to effect my life!

There is a book out called One Nation Under Therapy by Christina Hoff Sommers & Sally Satel which discusses how we as a society are raising a generation of wusses! As I said before it talks about the “Circle of Friends” game, it also talks about how they are starting to take red pens (you know ones they use to mark up tests) out of the schools because the color red is too stressful for students. The color red is being replaced by lavender because it is not quite as aggressive. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!? Our nation has become a place where self-obsession, self-pity, dependency, and a belief that one is not responsible for one's actions are the norm. It’s time someone started stood up and started rolling over on these wimp-asses. You should get fired for doing a rotten job not get a promotion (or counseling.) People should be allowed to make jokes without worrying about who you’re going to offend. You should be able to discipline (discipline not beat) your child with worrying about Child Welfare knocking on your door. You should be allowed to be open and honest with people not be marked as a “negative thinker.” We need to stop the pussification of America before we become the whole world’s butt monkey.